Could it be?

I'm outside your window looking in at the pretty light in your eyes.

Saturday, May 7, 2011


Woke up with a black eye. Not sure how I got it. My ear is killing me. I can't breathe through my nose. Had to go 2 hours out of town to pick up my cousin. The kid is as annoying as ever, which is to say, quite annoying. Oh, yeah, didn't mention I woke up at 1am with someone knocking at my door. Turned out to be this kid that lives near me yelling at me for "tapping on his window". I told him I didn't and he said he saw me walking away from his window, back towards my house, and apparently I was singing... I don't remember doing that; as far as I know I was asleep from about 6pm until he knocked at my door. I've never sleep walked before, nor have I sung in my sleep.

I typed that about 2 hours ago, if I'm remembering correctly... ^^^ I heard something outside and went to look and there was someone standing in my neighbors yard, behind a tree. It looked like a male, a very tall male, and it was just standing there... I just woke up in my house, my head hurts. I don't remember coming back inside. I just remember looking off my porch at it. My mother isn't home yet, she's been gone all day. I think I'm going to go to someone else's house for tonight.

Thursday, May 5, 2011

I'm unsure..

    I'm new to this blogging thing. I have been told I am a decent enough writer and I really need sometime to do to keep my mind off of somethings and maybe... make a connection to someone? I'm not sure how I should put it. I'm falling apart on the inside. I feel eyes on me constantly, even when I am alone. I feel like a figure lingers over my shoulder, constantly watching my every move. Every step I take is judged by someone I can't see. It's not god, atleast not mine. I see people, or a person, I can't tell. The shadows move when nothing is there to move them. Even the trees shape strangely, as if trying to cage something beneath them. I feel tired and sluggish. I've become more compulsive. I'm jumpy. I can't focus, I'm distracted. I just can't understand why though. Nothing is the same anymore. I'm drifting from my friends because I'm irritable and I change moods every second. I can't even think straight; my mind settles on images and words I've never seen or heard before. It's like someone is putting thoughts that are not my own into my mind.
    Even this post is taking longer than it should to be written. It's as if someone is constantly opening the door to look at me then closing it just before I can look and try to find the gaze that settles on me. Just a few weeks ago I was frolicking through life, enjoying every second of it. I want to go back to that.