I'm new to this blogging thing. I have been told I am a decent enough writer and I really need sometime to do to keep my mind off of somethings and maybe... make a connection to someone? I'm not sure how I should put it. I'm falling apart on the inside. I feel eyes on me constantly, even when I am alone. I feel like a figure lingers over my shoulder, constantly watching my every move. Every step I take is judged by someone I can't see. It's not god, atleast not mine. I see people, or a person, I can't tell. The shadows move when nothing is there to move them. Even the trees shape strangely, as if trying to cage something beneath them. I feel tired and sluggish. I've become more compulsive. I'm jumpy. I can't focus, I'm distracted. I just can't understand why though. Nothing is the same anymore. I'm drifting from my friends because I'm irritable and I change moods every second. I can't even think straight; my mind settles on images and words I've never seen or heard before. It's like someone is putting thoughts that are not my own into my mind.
Even this post is taking longer than it should to be written. It's as if someone is constantly opening the door to look at me then closing it just before I can look and try to find the gaze that settles on me. Just a few weeks ago I was frolicking through life, enjoying every second of it. I want to go back to that.
You're feeling classic signs of paranoia, determining what is making you feel this way is important. Your claims are interesting, mostly because I have encountered them personally and have crossed others who have as well. So you're not all by yourself there. Unfortunately, we rarely get to go back. Rather, we must push forth through it if we want to get back to something close to it.
ReplyDeleteIf you need any assistance we will be here.
Stay safe,
Shady
Welcome to the blogoshere.
ReplyDeleteThere are many gods, and if you have faith in yours, he-she-it-they should be able to protect you from your skulking shadow, even if only because they have a prior claim on your soul. Take comfort in that and tell your stalker that mentally or aloud. Your space is sacred and cannot be invaded by an alien presence unless you let it in.
The monster's physical minions however are still dangerous and you should be wary of them. (Speak softly but carry a big stick in other words.)
I don't even understand why all this is happening... I saw it again today. Watching me. I don't even know what "it" is... All I know is that it's presence is not a comfortable one. Shady, if you have anything you can tell me about your person experiences with this, I would really appreciate it.
ReplyDeleteMystery: Do you believe I'm in danger at this point?
I can tell you some of them privately, yes. Do you have a Youtube account we can contact one another by?
ReplyDeleteYes I do. It's carapherneliaP.
ReplyDelete